Hello darlings and welcome to my blog. I consider it to be a reblog blog and pretty much just have it set up as a means of distraction for myself, and not to really share stuff with other people. But, if you happen to find it interesting, by all means, follow me. I reblog mostly fandom and humor posts, but pretty much anything may wind up here. I post sporadically and in large quantities since I’m too lazy to use the queue. I hope you find what you’re looking for.
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What if all women were bigger and stronger than you? And thought they were smarter? What if women were the ones who started wars? What if too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos and no K-Y Jelly? What if the state trooper who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike was a woman and carried a gun? What if the ability to menstruate was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs? What if your attractiveness to women depended on the size of your penis? What if every time women saw you they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands? What if women were always making jokes about how ugly penises are and how bad sperm tastes? What if you had to explain what’s wrong with your car to big sweaty women with greasy hands who stared at your crotch in a garage where you are surrounded by posters of naked men with hard-ons? What if men’s magazines featured cover photos of 14-year-old boys with socks tucked into the front of their jeans and articles like: “How to tell if your wife is unfaithful” or “What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate” or “The truth about impotence”? What if the doctor who examined your prostate was a woman and called you “Honey”? What if you had to inhale your boss’ stale cigar breath as she insisted that sleeping with her was part of the job? What if you couldn’t get away because the company dress code required you wear shoes designed to keep you from running? And what if after all that women still wanted you to love them? By

For The Men Who Still Don’t Get It, Carol Diehl (via oitheresawargoingonhere)

Realist shit you’ll ever read.

(via avocadh0e)

Reblogged from hitlerstampon  239,924 notes
stepchildofthesun:

crystalmeowth:

whorem0anz:

My dog looks like a fuzzy penis. That is all, bye.

i sat here laughing for like ten minutes

I almost had a heart attack last night while my husband and I were lying in bed reading and his entire body starts shaking. I’m all ARE YOU OK ARE YOU HAVING A SEIZURE ARE YOU CRYING WHATS HAPPENING
and then i realize he’s just laughing hysterically- so hard that he CANT MAKE NOISE
And I go: Are you thinking about that damn penis dog again?
him: *silent nodding while he claps like a retarded seal*

stepchildofthesun:

crystalmeowth:

whorem0anz:

My dog looks like a fuzzy penis. That is all, bye.

i sat here laughing for like ten minutes

I almost had a heart attack last night while my husband and I were lying in bed reading and his entire body starts shaking. I’m all ARE YOU OK ARE YOU HAVING A SEIZURE ARE YOU CRYING WHATS HAPPENING

and then i realize he’s just laughing hysterically- so hard that he CANT MAKE NOISE

And I go: Are you thinking about that damn penis dog again?

him: *silent nodding while he claps like a retarded seal*